Les Discrets - Chanson D'automne

Listen to this as you read the poem below.

Enjoy!

Waiting

Waiting.
Waiting for my dreads to tighten up.
Waiting for her response.
Waiting for her thoughts about me.
Waiting for another who understands me.
Waiting for life at home to simmer.
Waiting for life at home this summer.
Waiting for 3 light bulbs.
Waiting for tonight.
Waiting for a job.
Waiting on Mrs. Reese.
Waiting on school.
Waiting on myself.
Waiting on God.
Waiting for a plan.
Waiting till I make myself stop waiting.
Anxiously check the clock.
Waiting.

Anoice - Glitch

Is This Lost?

I sit.
Lonely, humid.
The sweat drips.
Sticky droplets roll down my dreaded neck.
I itch.
Tight and loose, I have a headache.
Too many thoughts.
Too many thoughts.
Collect them, scramble to make it all fit together.
Unsettled the puzzle yells to be congruent.
Fix it please, my fingers are sliced and grazed.
My band-aid strips make sloppy work.
The work monocle is bent and cracked.
Blind, the eyes force information in.
Too many thoughts.
Want to scream, want to shout, I'm such a child.
I feel greedy and full of sloth, why I am so anti-kingdom?
I aim for a handful but i receive a pinch.
Yet that pinch is so fruitful.
and somehow I crave more, never satisfied.
I lose, but only because I let myself lose.
Apathy and I just can't get over each other, can we?
She just pulls me in, I can't help but embrace the lack of caring.
Her and Jealousy,  I stupidly picked them up on the street corner.
I am prostituting myself to the mundane.
Let It Go.
try to rest.
try to breathe.
5 days left.
5 till freedom.
5 till fear lunges at me.
5 till it gets quiet and peaceful.
5 till it gets quiet and lonesome.
5 till I can breathe again.
5 till I can breathe again.

So....I've decided I'm going to dress like a pirate now.

Hello, and g'day. I've observed a decent amount of punk and indie fashion, and I've decided that I'm going to dress all crusty looking.  What is a Crustie you may ask? Check out this link: http://www.terminal-boredom.com/crustpants.html which explains what crust pants are. Crust pants are worn by punks, but more specifically crust punks.  Crust punks are a type of punk, and traditionally dress dirtier and more disheveled than normal punks already do; hence the name "crustie". This means patched, torn,safety-pinned and dirty looking clothes. Sounds fun eh? Anyways, punks have a sort of ethic, called "do it yourself", aka DIY. This idea comes from doing things for yourself, instead of relying on someone else. If you don't know how to fix something you find a way to learn.  Though I am not completely into the DIY idea, I definitely support it in regards to clothing and footwear.  I have chosen to act in DIY fashion and fix my clothes and to not spend extra money on fixing my appearance.

Although these pants are pretty ridiculous looking, I am in the process of creating a tamer version. If you look at the picture in my first post you can see a primitive version of them. I find this way of dressing to be so creative and trend-breaking, and that is my main reason for dressing this way. I've decided that I'm not going to buy any more pants if I don't have to. I feel that I have too much: 4 pairs of black skinny jeans, 2 of them have patches, soon to be crust pants; 1 pair of my already crusty pants, one pairs of regular fitting blue jeans, and then a pair of baggy camouflage pants. the rest i own are shorts or capri's that'll end up getting crusted up down the road anyway.  This plan not to buy new pants or shorts is to 1. save money. 2. add reasons to make my stuff more creative. and 3. to teach me to be frugal, and to not buy into consumerism (pun intended).  I'm going to work on modifying some of my clothes, I'd like to make pair of overalls, pants with a bum flap, and other strange but fun additions you don't normally see on clothing.

As far as shirts go, all of my old large and x-l shirts from my thicker days, which feel too baggy now, I'm going to cut apart and sew onto smaller sized plain or otherwise cover-able shirts that i can find for cheap costs at thrift stores.  I'm modifying some army uniforms shirts and other natural looking button-up apparel to fit my style also. For the indie look, I like the vests, v-necks, corduroy, and general style. All of this is outside the realm of hipsters though. (chuckles).


So why Crust and Indie? It's appealing to me, regarding creativity and the semi-natural look of some indie clothes. What does all of this mean? Not much i guess , I'm just rambling about something i"m excited about.  Sadly some common themes with punks are homelessness, substance abuse, theft, terrible attitudes, etc.  I of course, will not show this of rubbish in my character.  I'm going to bash pre-misconceptions, and stereotypes with my positive and loving attitude. I'm rather excited really, my conflicting look and actions with confuse others and draw more attention to my motives for Christ... I hope. You guys probably think I'm batty. what canya do. haha. The End.

Happy Trails!

Just... Breathe.

Morn.
Heat.

Amble onto the bus, flick my I.D, it's muggy in here.
Waiting for the bell, sweat drips down the lockers.
Sneakers squeak, linoleum, I like my friends.
Thinking quite a bit today, rush through ceramics, bored in english, caught with phone.
good chats in geometry, not gonna do well on the final, the bell rings.
Bus ride back, it's muggy here too.
Home.
Worn.
Rest.
Heat.
Stress.
It's too quiet in this hollow cave.
My thoughts scream at me.
Directions and accusations.
They bash my mind and scramble me.
Like imps they taunt my actions and motives
I lack the will to complete useless tasks.
This takes me further down from achievement.
Why? Should my motivation be spurred by final grades?
I have no need for this.
No distractions, focus attempt, fall short, 11 days.
11 till I grasp sanity again.
11 to finish work.
11 to iron out my schedule.
11 to volunteer.
11 till I start breathing again.

Alas.Today's blog proves useless.

Tried blogging this morning.  My scattered and uncollected thoughts stray, and trot away from me.  Couldn't come up with anything significant . Another day I suppose.  Happy Trails.

Introduction and Explanation

This blog contains rambling of an Ordinary Radical.

An Ordinary Radical is someone who lives an ordinary life of in a spiritually radical manner, just as Jesus calls us to do.  The phrase "Ordinary Radical" comes from two parts.

The first, Ordinary: I am just one of God's many creations, I am no better than anyone else.

And the second, Radical: I choose to live radically, striving to love others unconditionally, truly and wholeheartedly act as Jesus did.

This is very difficult to achieve and I do not claim to have put out the effort it takes, I'm certainly in some terms, a failure when it comes to loving others.  But this is still my goal. Feeble, struggling, and running forward I strive for my best and the best Christ can bring up out of me. Regardless of my own application, in the end my flesh will fail me and I am forced to rely on God's strength.

Now to the blogging.

I will journal a decent amount, talk about life, share my views on things, review music,post interesting, thought-provoking, and sometimes just plain cool links.

G'day,

Clifford